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Tuesday, March 28, 2006

I think I'd like to die today. 

Pintu rumah.
Kunci.
Buka.
Alarm.
Ganti tampon.
Ganti celana panjang.
Halaman belakang.
Novel pinjaman.
4 batang rokok, habis sampai filter.
Doa.
Laptop.
Sign in.
Offline messages:
Ada seorang pria beli viagra krn mahal tdk ditelan tapi dijilati.hasilnya ruar biasa! 3 hari tdk bisa makan krn lidah ereksi
Senyum pertama hari ini.
i saw u walking on the street. u lips, u eyes, u nose....... everything look perfect. i couldn't helpsing to my self, WHO LET DOGS OUT!! WOOF!! WOOF! WOOF!!!!
Sialan orang satu ini.
WHEN GOD OPEN THE WINDOW OF HEAVEN, HE SAW ME AND ASK, "WHAT IS UR WISH 4 TODAY?" I SAID,"LORD, PLEASE TAKE CARE THE PERSON WHO'S READING THIS MESSAGE.
...
Pingin nangis.
Tidak ada waktu untuk tangis.
Tidak ada energi untuk tangis.
Ganti kaos.
Bikini.
Alas kain warna warni.
Halaman belakang.
Berbaring.
4 batang rokok, habis sampai filter.
Lelah.
pisau cukur.karbol wangi.pisau dapur.skalpel bedah.silet nadi.silet leher.minum racun.tabrak lari.10 butir panadol.tiduran di jalan sibuk penuh mobil.benamkan diri di sungai.gantung diri.
Doa.
Saya ingin mati hari ini.

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Monday, March 27, 2006

Malesin banget sih. 

Mmhh.. *ngucek mata*. Jam berapa ya sekarang? Raba-raba meja lampu sebelah tempat tidur untuk nyari weker yg ngga dipake untuk waking me up. Ah.. jam 10.28, siang. Eh.. kok tangan gue item-item sih jarinya? Bah, baru sadar. Kemarin lupa hapus make up! Sekarang tangan penuh eyeliner. Argh.. malesin banget sih.

Damn, who left the door open? Aduuh.. sunlight.. kepala gue sakit. Ke kampus ngga ya? Hm.. Jalan ke kampus bolak balik satu setengah jam. Kuliah cuma satu jam, dan direkam pula. What a hard choice... NOT. Hehehe... malesin banget sih.

Jalan ke kamar mandi. Sikat gigi, lihat kaca, lalu menyesal. Igh, muka gue penuh eyeliner sama eyeshadow yg belon diapus dari tadi malem. Hmph.. Ambil kapas, eye make up remover, lalu wipe wipe wipe sampe bersih. Ah.. rasanya kaya udah cuci muka. Ngga perlu cuci muka lagi deh. Hihihi... Sikat gigi. Hueks... kecolok sikat. Hoek... hoeeek.. hoeeeeek... igh. Yg keluar asem lambung. Malesin banget sih.

Jalan males-malesan ke dapur. Buka lemari makanan. Hm.. kering. Ngambil mangkok kecil, sendok, cereal dan susu putih di kulkas. Umh... what is that smell? Mendekati tempat sampah pelan-pelan sambil makan cereal. Angkat tutup tempat sampah dan... *jerit sejadi-jadinya* BELATUNG! Tempat sampah gue penuh belatung!!!!!!!! Aduuuuuuuuuuuhhh.. malesin banget siiiiiih.

Nangis sendirian sambil makan cereal.

Hhh... ditambah G-string biru manis yg hilang entah kemana, keharusan beli tampon lagi, dan kondom baru yg bisa getar sendiri, tapi harganya mahal betul.

Nangis sendirian, cereal habis.

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Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Simply Understandable 

why do we leave?
so we could find a way to return
why do we become lost?
so we could remember, that for once, we knew the way

few smiles are just so that you have to smile back

why do we ask questions?
because we want to know more
why are we interested?
because we prefer not to be bored

boredom is one of the greatest human achievements
it has brought you here
to what you are today

how do you know you have grown?
when you look back at a long time ago, and laugh

a wise man (and to be politically correct, woman) is one who can laugh at his (and her) own mistakes
but not just laugh
correct their mistakes

kalimat yg sering digunakan ayah saya kalau saya melakukan hal bodoh terlalu sering: "Keledai saja ngga jatuh dalam satu lubang yg sama dua kali!"
hahaha...

simply understandable.

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Monday, March 06, 2006

Too many reasons 

Why do you love me?
Because I can't help not to.

Why do you love me?
I don't.
Then, why don't you?
Because you don't love me.

Why do you love me?
Because I need to love someone.
But why me?
Because I can't find anyone else.

Why do you love me?
Because you remind me of someone I loved a long time ago.
You don't love me. You love him.

Why do you love me?
Because you loved me first.

Why do you love me?
I can't answer that. I choose not to answer that.

Why do you love me?
Because you hit me. I have to love you.

Why do you love me?
What makes you so sure I love you?

Why do you love me?
I don't. I hate you.

Why do you love me?
Because you find a million reasons to make me smile. Because I only need to look at you to make my whole day perfect. Because your presence makes me warm. Because I know now you're the one. Because I want to be with you the rest of my life. Because I need you more than I need anything else in the world.
But I don't love you...

Why don't you love me?
Because you tie me down. Because you hold me too tight. Because you won't let me breathe. Because you don't give me a chance to fall in love with you. Because you make me sick! Because I can't stand your voice, your face, your questions questions QUESTIONS. Because I hate every living cell in your body. I hate how you treat me!
But I love you...




I love you.
I love you, too.
I love you, more.
That's not possible. No one loves you more than me.
I still love you more.
I love you.
Me too.






I miss loving someone that much...

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