Aren't you sick of me yet?

Yep. It's that time of the year again. Saat gue harus diam dan berhenti blogging sebentar untuk mengejar mimpi ayah dan bunda... eh salah maksudnya mimpinya gue gitu supaya bisa lulus dengan tidak jelek" banget. Jadi, gue diem dulu ya. Kalian aja yg ngoceh. Gue lebih suka ngedengerin koq. Nanti kalo udah selesai semua exam" gue, don't call me. I'll call you. Mwah. Wismilak.

*Photos courtesy of Eiffel, I'm in Love Duh, pengen. Pengen Semmy-nya. Pengen ciumnya. Pengen Eiffel Towernya. Gue ngaku deh. Gue super HBL sekarang...

Perfect I met a man. He is lovely. He's gorgeous. He has a great body. Nice tan. Love the abs. He's tall. I'm only up to his chin. He's got perfectly built arms and absolutely no chest hair, which is important. I don't really like super hairy men. Itchy stuff. Anyway, he's just physically perfect for me! He's so sweet. He's sensitive and caring and he listens to me. Every single word, and he doesn't forget. There was one time I was so sad over something, and he put his arms around me and hugged me so tight. I felt so warm and so much better. I just really love the way he cares for me. Did I tell you he cooks? He is most definitely a devil in the kitchen. He makes a killer lamb rack and, surprisingly, he loves salad! He is so fashionable and I love his casual, hot, I-know-I'm-hot look. And the way he smells. Mmm... I can not begin to tell you how great he smells. I fell asleep in his bed once, and I had some nice dreams that night, if you know wh...

Bitch Fit I'm not trying to be naive, or to be selective in whatever I hear. I know they suffer and I know they're dying while I sit comfortably sipping my two sugar flat white after a small serving of pasta. I know they need help and I know damn well that whatever I have now can feed them for at least 3 months. I know that they would gladly give a limb to live the way I do everyday. I fucking know all that. And, yes, my heart goes out to each and every one of them. But don't think for one second that all that knowledge makes me feel better about myself. I fucking don't, and it fucking doesn't! I don't want to be a hard-ass by saying I don't fucking care, but if everytime I have a meal or sit in a comfortable bus or waste food or waste water or spend a lot of money on something I most probably don't need, and you're gonna be all up in my face saying that they don't have anything and that I should feel lucky that I do have what I have, FUCK YOU! Y...

Apa loe bilang??! "Kayanya enak yah, kalo taro lah gitu gue udah umur 30an, punya kerjaan tetap, terus gue udah punya istri, punya anak... Kayanya hidup udah settle gitu deh" *pandangan menerawang* Oh. Urutannya harus gitu yah? Kerja, nikah, punya anak. "Ya iya lah!" *ngakak* "Emang mau loe gimana?" Mhh.. Ngga mau nikah. Mau kerja dulu. Langsung punya anak. "Buset dah! Pembuahan artificial gituh? Tanpa ayah?" Ngga lah. Gue mau adopsi ajah. "Haaa..??!" *melotot* "Loe ngga mau ngelahirin anak sendiri?" Ngga mau. Gue mau ngadopsi ajah. Emang kenapa? "Ya bukan apa-apa siih.. Cuma, apa loe ngga mau ngerasain yg namanya hamil sama melahirkan anak loe sendiri? Minimal anak pertama deeeh. Anak pertama loe lahirin sendiri, terus yg abis itu loe adopsi. Gimana?" Ngga mau. Gue mau ngadopsi ajah. "Kenapa sih emang?" *narik napas panjang, ngebetulin posisi duduk biar keliatan lebih meyakinkan* Well, pertimbangan gue gi...

Surat ini fiktif lho... Dear you, Udah lama aku ngga nulis ke kamu. Too long, I guess. Bukan maksudku buat menghilang, tapi aku cuma butuh a little alone time. Waktu untuk kontemplasi diri, untuk berpikir. Aku tahu kamu minta aku untuk ngga ungkit ini lagi. Aku cuma mau bilang kalo aku udah nerima perpisahan kita. Aku udah bisa terima alasan kamu, dan aku sadar kalo kamu capek. Aku ngerti. But you know, you're still killing me, and I'm still loving it. I'm still loving you. Aku coba untuk lupakan kamu, tapi kamu menjejak terlalu dalam di kepalaku. Semakin kucoba ngelupain kamu, semakin semua hal ngingetin aku sama kamu. Senyum kamu. Tertawa kamu. Setiap mimik dan gerakmu. Bau khas rambutmu. Diammu... Terlebih aku teringat diammu. Dan air matamu. Aku coba lari dari semua itu, tapi memori tentangmu selalu mengejarku. You were killing me, in a very painful way. Aku hindari semua teleponmu, hapus semua sms darimu. Semua usahamu mengontakku kutolak dan kubuang. Aku ingin menghap...

Yah... "it's like, ... we need something more tangible than a feeble fable about some obscure rainbow where the psychology has been perversely reversed as one has suggested." - reykjavic - So, is it me you want to know about? Fine... Ask away. Ngga terlalu banyak yg bisa diceritain tentang gue, apalagi sekarang ini. Dibilang sibuk, ngga juga. Dibilang santai, ngga juga. Selalu ada sesuatu yg come up at the last minute, atau ditinggalkan sampai the last minute, lalu nyesel. Mau betul bantu" teman dengan semua masalah"nya, tapi koq kaya males? Jujur, saya mau banget bantu kalian. Saya coba sebaik baiknya ya. Besok, mulai puasa. Do'ain bisa bangun sahur. Pernah denger kata "the eyes are the windows to the mind"? Ternyata, artinya literal. Mata adalah sebagian dari otak yg memanjang keluar dari cranial space dan duduk di socket. Bagian dari otak yg kena udara segar. Windows to the mind. Ada hal menarik lain yg gue mau tulis disini, tapi lupa. Nanti de...

Denial Malem" tiba" craving pengen minum es kopi. Untung lagi ada ice cappucino dan ice chocolate yg beli minggu lalu. Minum itu lah sebelon tidur. Bakal jadi simpatisan puasa lagi untuk tahun yg ketiga ini. Toleransi karena salah satu best friend disini puasa. Gue enjoy buka bareng karena makan sama" itu paling enak, dan gue juga demen buat es buah. Hehehe... Seger bener dah. Selamat puasa buat semua yg ngejalanin, baik ibadah maupun iseng mau diet. Ada yg bilang gue lagi denial. Iye kali yeee... Another foto yg iseng" gue take. Jangan dicolong please. Gue sedang consider mau belajar fotografi dari salah satu kenalan ortu gue. Dia kemaren baru liburan di salah satu beach di daerah selatan Perth, dan dia sempet foto" banyak banget scenery yg menurut gue mantep abis! Akhirnya di frame dan dijual AU$60.00 tanpa frame dan AU$100 plus frame. Worth every penny you spend. Tapi, fotografi itu agak costly ya, jadi mungkin gue mau kerja dulu deh, baru nyoba" hobi b...